Nosce Te Ipsum

I'm sure I've touched upon this topic over and over, but what the hell? I feel like writing, so I'll write again about my favourite topic: us.

I used to feel dreadfully alone in the world. I could be in a sea of people and feel no connection to them. I would sit and commiserate and lament my not being able to relate to anyone. I hear friends describe the abyss in which they find themselves, seemingly unable to escape.

I also see the incessant need for many of us to distance ourselves from societal affairs. Most of us feel that, because we are not directly involved in, say, one person's poverty or injustice, that the problem is not ours. I also see the tendency for many of us to point fingers at others, to divert the attention away from ourselves, and blame them for their plight.

I had a conversation with my mother about how certain people think too highly of themselves. She claimed these people love themselves too much, while I argued to the contrary, claiming they adopt this persona as a means of defending themselves against their own self-loathing; in other words, they fear being inferior to the group, so they act as superior (I believe Alfred Adler theorized this).

What does all this mean? Is this simply another of a long series of my crazy bantering? Are you wondering when I will finally begin to make sense? Perhaps even I don't know what I'm saying most of the time.

I suppose the point I'm hoping to make is: Why must we feel so alone?

For whatever reason, we seem to focus on how different we are from one another. We have trouble relating to others because they don't know how we feel, but is this true? We cast stones at each other because we feel we have the answers and they don't, but is this true? We blame others for their problems while washing our own hands clean, but is this true? We label others as burdensome to us, but who is the true source of the burden?

We see people as "us" and "them", but is this true? Who are "us" and "them"? Do "they" not also think and feel? Do "they" not also interact with the universe and form beliefs about it? Do "they" not also fear and doubt and worry? Do "they" not also love? Do "they" not also desire to live?

There was an open question posed asking what the solution is to all society's ills. Many shared their opinions on the matter, and some subsequently attacked the opinions of others. I wonder if any of these people know where the solution actually lies. I've had this discussion plenty of times with people from some political stripe or another claiming theirs is the answer, and I wonder if they really know. When I see these debates, I'm always left wondering if anyone wants to identify the problem, or spend their energy clinging to their solution.

Here I go, pointing fingers at everyone again. I cannot profess to knowing what the solution is, either, for I have come to my own conclusions that may or may not be accurate. Perhaps I can suggest a starting point, though I'll leave it to you to take what you will from it.

I wonder how many of us know ourselves - I mean really know ourselves - enough to know where the solution lies. I wonder how many of us actually look at ourselves; I wonder how many of us desire to do so. We seem to want to focus the spotlight outward, on "them", yet are afraid to look critically at "us".

I believe there is an old proverb that say for every time I point my finger at someone, a thousand are pointing at me. Right now, your fingers are probably pointed in my direction, and you may be passing judgment on me based on what I write here, as I'm sure I've done to you along the way. Perhaps each time I put myself out here, I call upon your assistance in seeing myself, should I choose to accept what I see.

My feeling is, these problems are allowed to perpetuate because we are afraid of ourselves. We distance ourselves from them because we cannot bear the thought of our being connected to them, which in turn exacerbates our being part of the problem. We deny ourselves each day, when we idolize this person and denigrate that person and distance ourselves from those people. We are all such beautiful people capable of so much; our potential is limitless, yet we incessantly erect barriers around ourselves.

The burden does not lie within anyone else; we create the burden ourselves. I can decry the use of my tax dollars being "wasted on losers", but all I am doing is burdening myself with my own insecurity. Similarly, by denigrating others, are they burdening me by disagreeing with me, or by being "stupid", or am I placing the burden on myself by resorting to bickering and name-calling? Do I see this in myself while engrossed in the act?

In the grand scheme of things, we are akin to water molecules in an ocean; I may be this molecule and you may be that molecule, but together, we comprise the vast ocean, and not one of us is any more or less important than any other. If I could give advice - moreso to myself than anyone else - it would be this: don't let your being this particular molecule detract your vision from the ocean.

Nosce te ipsum: know thyself!