What are we really learning?

"Schools are a continuation of toilet training.
"Taking an exam is like taking a shit. You hold it in for weeks, memorizing, just waiting for the right time. Then the time comes, and you sit on the toilet.
"Ah!
"Um!
"It feels so good.
"You shit it right back on schedule--for the grade. When exams are over, you got a load off your mind. You got rid of all that shit you clogged your poor brain with. You can finally relax.
"The paper you write your exam on is toilet paper."
- Jerry Rubin

Yesterday, I successfully leaped through the latest in the series of hoops required for admission into graduate school: I wrote the psychology version of the Graduate Record Examination. This week, another application for funding is due, well before my applications to graduate school. Six weeks ago, I wrote the general version of the GRE. This week, I have two midterms. Soon, a term paper will be due, followed shortly by the first draft of my honours thesis. Then more exams. Then a two week break during which, upon instruction, I will dash to the stores and consume for my loved ones.

I find it apropos that I delivered a seminar on obedience this past week. The class was given a discussion question on the necessity of obedience in child-rearing, particularly when and how much was appropriate. The same can be asked about our education system: how much obedience is necessary? at what age should we expect students to think reasonably for themselves?

Come to think of it, do we really want our students thinking for themselves? Would our education system be what it is if they did? Are students rewarded for thought, for awareness? After spending a grand total of twenty years as a student, I can say there have been a few bright spots in which I was afforded opportunities to express some semblance of creativity, but by and large, year after year, I've been trained to cram load after load of shit into my brain and regurgitate it onto the test paper; my reward, a token letter grade next to my name, an indelible brand I can show to prospective advisors and employers. In essence, I have learned to do as I am told, and am rewarded handsomely for it.

Seeing as how I am not alone on this path I trod, I have made many acquaintances leading up to this benchmark we call the GRE. We talked at great length of the countless hours we each sacrficed in preparation for these three-hour-long exams, and whether or not we would ascertain scores high enough to seduce would-be academic supervisors. I met these wonderfully bright people who became so frenetic hoping to measure up to someone arbitrary standard set by an entity interested in sucking dollars out of the pockets of seemingly credulous students.

I can relate this to what I saw at my past job: students, fresh out of university, spending enough time in the company to see the gaping flaws in its operation, yet not having the confidence to approach anyone about it, simply waiting for the next task to be assigned to them. I, myself, was of the same ilk, forever waiting to be told what to do next, never having the confidence to let my voice be heard. I proposed to a colleague that our company let recent graduates gain insight into how the outfit is run and be encouraged to share any ideas they may have about how things can be improved. Oh, if only our superiors had the time to act as suitable mentors...

It pained me to see our blossoming youth frantically marching to the beat of some administrator's drum. It pained me to see myself doing the same.

The very morning I was to write this latest exam, I read the above excerpt on the train ride downtown. Since summer, I had been preparing for this day, wondering whether or not I would manage to remember the breadth of information accumulated over a full year of psychology courses; then my eyes meet the words at the top of this page and I sit agog in my seat. Why have I chosen this path? Why am I jumping through these hoops? To do the same once I'm a certified "graduate student"? Or when I'm a professor, kowtowing to governments and corporate entities for research grants?

What are we really learning? Are we really gaining acumen into how our world works, and how we can contribute to its well-being? Are we really learning to be the "leaders of tomorrow", to be the benevolent force for our neighbours, for our own children? Or are we merely learning to be instruments of some external authority, committing bits of information to our memories and barking them on command? Is my ability to score in the ninetieth percentile on some standardized test indicative of my ability to conduct academic research? Does my score on a multiple-choice exam limn my acumen in psychological principles and theories? Or am I simply performing for treats in a Skinnerian token economy?

Fifteen years ago, Perry Farrell said we'll make great pets. Perhaps he should have rephrased: we always have.

This isn't to say we're forever doomed to stand on our hind legs when the prospects for accolades arise. We're better than that, and one day soon, very soon, it will manifest on the surface. The time will come when we will wonder how we ended up beneath the auspices of such an absurd system. No more will our youth be driven to neuroticism jumping through hoop after flaming hoop; the confidence they will harbour in themselves will supersede anything a standardized test could possibly elicit.

It's high time we actually nurtured the gifts in our young. Just think of the beautiful contributions to society they can make if allowed to flourish. Our obedience training has done none of us any good; the rotten state of our planet corroborates such an assertion. Not only are their lives ruined by it, but so are ours, as we will have no one to plumb our machinations with a critical eye.

I suppose, though, I'm one to talk, for here I am, sifting through page after page, hoping to etch as much of these factoids as I can into my brain, thereby improving my odds of gaining the establishment's stamp of approval.

I feel like crying now.

Quietly, I remain optimistic. It's what keeps me alive.