Rotating back to the world...

...from the secret realm of the divine to the cold, noxious surface of this planet we call Earth. I know, it's a pretty awful thing to say about the world in which we live, but, after a weekend of venturing deeper into myself, of testing and overcoming boundaries, of being immersed in the unrestrained love of so many others, I find myself again in the shit, as it were, wondering if I should retreat to whatever friendly confines I can find, or stay and fight. Though the temporary relief offered by the former is tempting, it does not do any of us good, for - here it comes - there will come a day when my confines will cease being so friendly on account of my standing waist-deep in the backwash from the pipe down which I had hoped to flush all my cares.

I spent part of yesterday asking random people in downtown Toronto whether or not it is possible to construct a divine society. Normally, I'm too afraid to make eye contact with anyone, let alone engage in dialogue, but I had received a series of important lessons from a series of important people, and they all said for me to stop wallowing in self-doubt, to stop allowing the fear to whip my ass with a belt; in short, to stand on my own two legs and do something. I received mixed reactions to my query: for the most part, I was greeted with a "no", reason being we simply don't care enough to do it; however, I did receive some positive feedback, even seeing a glimmer of hope emerge from one of the nay-sayers.

I thought about this today as I returned to the message boards for the heated political discussions, and was confronted with one's staunch opinion favouring surveillance of the proletariat through closed-circuit cameras in public areas. I tried to persuade him - well, I shouldn't try to persuade anyone to conform to my view, for two people will always see the world from varying perspectives - I tried to highlight the air of mistrust the government creates (and perpetuates) when it legislates surveillance of its citizens, but alas, he would have none of it, telling me I have to "see the positive side of cameras". While I do not condemn him for his stance, I'm afraid I cannot agree, for no good can possibly come from a society whose inhabitants not only live in constant fear of one another, but also seek to capitalize on it. He went on to say it is for our "security"; here, I again cite the same wise persons to whom I alluded earlier when I say seeking "security" by erecting barriers and spying on others because you have no faith in them makes you insecure, and when you lack faith in your fellow human being, you possess none in yourself.

It took many years for me to learn to see myself in others and them in me; the events of the past weekend served to hit me over the head with it like a sack of hammers. We cannot expect to build a divine society when we remain apprehensive of one another, when we fail to see ourselves in one another, when we detach ourselves from one another. The powers-that-be - those men who hide in their motorcades and ivory towers - wish to have their eyes on us at all times because they fear the consequences of our unleashing the good within us, of allowing it to flourish. They seek to suppress this awesome force because they are afraid to surrender the temporal power to which they cling so dearly.

We will never create a divine society if we continue to succumb to our own collective ego and "other" people: by affixing labels such as "criminal" or "terrorist" or "junky" or "politician" or "tyrant" or "Black" or "White". A society is not divine when its inhabitants systematically reject people on the grounds mentioned above. Solzhenitsyn said, and I paraphrase, the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being. This is what it means to see oneself in others.

I still harbour the urge to discard all hope and return to my comfortable coma, but as I entertain such a notion, I ask myself what good it will do? I might as well slash my wrists in the bathtub (do everything one hundred percent, as the spiritual masters say - after all, paraphrasing Castaneda, a warrior either lives or dies; there is no in-between).

This will not be easy, but it can - nay, must be done, but it cannot be done alone. Perhaps I'm the wrong person to extol the cry of oneness, of divinity, for I am still struggling with my own demons, aptly named Fear and Doubt. It pains me greatly to see what we do to each other and ourselves - in essence, what we do to each other, we do to ourselves - how we destroy the beauty in this world without batting an eyelash.

Alas, I'm rambling, so here is where I will take my leave, but before I retire, permit me to wish you all a splendid evening/day. And I will say again: you are the light of the world.

Mahalo.