To see the world as a classroom...

This I learned while reading a Buddhist Monk's journey to enlightenment. Here is something else I read recently:

Daily overview for Aries, 6 November 2008: "Look even farther ahead today -- you need to be thinking really long-term, possibly in terms of generations. Your big ideas are worth pursuing, even if you might not see all of their effects."

Yesterday, I faced a trivial yet seemingly difficult decision: should I attend class and keep pace with the discussion material, or attend this "day of action" orchestrated by the Canadian Federation of Students to call on our provincial (and federal, I presume) legislators to drop tuition fees? Having yet to completely purge my diffidence, I asked myself if the latter was really worth doing, if enough of our undergaduate students cared enough to attend the rally, if this collective voice would fall on deaf ears, if I really should bother with such futile nonsense and focus my energy on getting mine. Even as I delayed my arrival to campus to coordinate with the start of the festivities, I questioned whether I was doing the right thing, whether I really belonged here. At this time, I looked upon the volunteers distributing placards and assembling the apparatus and stood arrested by an appreciation for the painstaking efforts they exercised for a cause in which they firmly believed was necessary for all students, and said to myself, "If they are able to make such sacrifices, there's no reason why I shouldn't do the same." So I grabbed a placard and joined the party.

Initially, I was a bit apprehensive, not knowing anyone personally on campus, but soon, I found myself caught in the current of the rally? So what if I didn't know anyone here? We are all students, and as such, face the same tribulations, one of which being feverishly treading water so as to receive some piece of paper and be shuffled off to some job. The energy level continued to rise as the day progressed, as students from our campus convened with those from other campuses to march through the streets of downtown Toronto on our way to the Provincial Legislature. I shouted until I was hoarse, and marched until my legs felt like rubber, but I kept shouting and marching, driven by the energy of the several thousand of us who were there, all with the same hopes and dreams, all with the same setbacks, all with the same purpose. I even made a few friends along the way. All in all, I say I had myself a fine day, all in the while learning the necessary life lessons few classrooms can provide.

The first lesson I learned - and by first, I mean the first that is salient in my mind - regarded the label by which we students were referred at administrative meetings: BIU, or business income unit, if memory serves me correctly. Dare I think this is all we are? It isn't bad enough that we're each assigned a number by which we are identified until graduation, followed by another number at our job; we are further dehumanized by this notion of being nothing more than rudimentary units pumping cash into the university.

The next lesson concerned what we were doing, what we were seeking to accomplish. Sure, this action pertained specifically to post-secondary tuition, but in the grand scheme of things, our action means so much more. It is amazing how one can select a single issue around which to rally, then soon learn how this particular issue connects to everything else. For instance, when delving into government support for post-secondary institutions, one quickly discovers how much is spent each year on war, both domestically and abroad, money better served by bolstering education or health or the well-being of those who struggle for a single meal. A student in college or university can easily sympathize with a worker struggling to pay the bills - the former eventually becomes the latter - or even with someone struggling to exist.

Furthermore - and this might just be the most important one of all - I received a lesson taught to me many times before, yet so easily forgotten; that is, how powerful our attitudes are. Initially, I was skeptical about the whole thing, doubting if this would be worthwhile, wondering if anyone would care, dismissing it before it had a chance to do anything. Then I realized the trap I set for myself: of course it won't work with that attitude! When we doubt the efficacy of our actions, we defeat ourselves before setting foot onto the playing field! We talk and we talk and we talk so much about the so-called enemies we need to conquer - administrations, governments, capitalists, thieves, et cetera - while systematically ignoring the greatest enemy we have ever faced: ourselves. If we continue to shackle ourselves in diffidence, the world around us will remain cold, cruel, uncaring. Any movement, whatever the cause may be, aimed at making our world more loving, more respectful, more compassionate, begins not with a critical mass taking to the streets, nor with the distribution of a newsletter; rather, it starts within each of us, when we decide there are matters more important than jumping through the required number of hoops that require our attention, when we realize the power to facilitate change - real change! - lies not within some outside authority, but within each of us.

Today, I did not go to campus, for there was no academic activity; our teaching assistants, graduate assistants and contract faculty walked off the job this morning. An ugly two-month-long propaganda war, bound to continue for a while yet, has resulted in this job action, leaving not only their future but ours in limbo. During these last two months, I've been exposed to a variety of opinions on the matter: the Administration decried the Union's "unreasonable" demands; the Union remonstrated the sub-poverty living its members are earning; students all over fretted over their future. I'll admit, I don't know the whole story - then again, how many of us do? - but, if what they say is true, I don't see anything wrong with demanding a living wage.

This impasse, though, is not solely about money, but something far greater. It is also about academic freedom being compromised by corporate interests who pump cash into universities. It is also about how our we are educated, a matter I described in greater detail in a recent post: can we really call this an institute of "higher learning" if we are trained not to reason for ourselves and believe in the potential of our own ideas, but rather to jump through hoop after bloody hoop, performing at each step for treats in the form of grades and grants and other goodies, living in constant fear of rejection? What the fuck kind of "higher learning" is this?

Please excuse my potty mouth; I'm whipping myself into a frenzy.

I don't exactly know to which "big ideas" of mine my horoscope eludes, but I concur with the need for thinking long-term, over several generations, for this line explicates why we do this: we don't actively seek change for ourselves, but those who will inherit this world one day and ought not to have our problems bestowed upon them.

That's enough incoherent rambling for me this evening.